All of the Small Things

Last May was a rather insane month for me. It involved a new addition to the family (a small fluffy one, not a human larva), the loss of my job, and my first award for painting that actually came with a medal. Had losing my job not been so awful, it would have been the best month I'd had in a long time.

But that last bit is what I really want to talk about. ( I will discuss the puppy later, she requires a bit of time to talk about) What is it about losing one's job that is so devastating? When I lost mine it was like the entire world dumped upside down and broke into a shower of tiny glittering pieces. The initial shock just left me sitting among the ruins of a future that would never be, and I had no idea why I wasn't able to simply pick up and move on.

I still haven't completely moved on due to the fact that I haven't found a job and other extenuating circumstances continue to have the details of the loss of my job haunt me constantly. It is just like having food poisoning. Whenever I think of starting a new job I get sick to my stomach even though I know it is what I need in order to stay afloat.

Lucky for us all there is a cure. It has to be drained out, in drips and gushes, until it is no longer in one's system. The trick is finding an outlet fast enough to stop it from spreading to other parts of your life and even future performance.

And so that is what I am doing. In drips and gushes, I am removing this poison one letter at a time.